Vaker nee zeggen.
We hebben het allemaal wel eens meegemaakt: een vriend(in) of collega vraagt je om iets te doen, maar je hebt er eigenlijk geen zin in of het komt je niet goed uit. En toch … toch zeg je ja. Omdat je denkt dat de ander boos wordt. Omdat je vindt dat het je plicht is om te helpen. Of gewoon omdat je aardig bent. Toch balen veel mensen ervan dat ze geen nee kunnen zeggen. Terwijl nee zeggen juist iets positiefs kan zijn!
Waarom nee zeggen positief is voor jezelf én voor die ander
Van nature denken we dat iets weigeren negatief is. Je stelt anderen teleur en dat maakt je niet populair. Maar aan de andere kant: als je te vaak ja zegt, kom je zelf onder druk te staan. Je hebt geen tijd meer om te doen wat echt belangrijk is. Voor jou. Daar krijg je uiteindelijk stress van. Bovendien ben je niet echt gemotiveerd en lever je vaak maar half werk als je met tegenzin ja hebt gezegd. En daar wordt die ander ook niet blij van!
Wees altijd duidelijk
Het is wel belangrijk dat je duidelijk bent en snel antwoord geeft. Ook als je eerst na moet denken. Zo voorkom je namelijk een misverstand en heeft de ander de tijd om nog iets anders te verzinnen. Probeer daarbij woorden als ‘misschien’ of ‘liever niet’ te vermijden. Die houden de deur op een kier. Daardoor denkt die ander dat er tóch een mogelijkheid is dat je ze kan helpen. Dat maakt het gesprek er voor beide kanten niet leuker op.
Zo kun je nee zeggen tegen vrienden & op het werk
Nee zeggen tegen vrienden of op het werk blijkt vaak het moeilijkst. Je wilt natuurlijk wel een goede relatie houden met je vrienden, collega’s of je baas. Gelukkig zijn er manieren om nee te zeggen op een positieve manier. Bedank je baas of je vrienden bijvoorbeeld eerst voor het feit dat ze aan je hebben gedacht. En je kunt misschien ook helpen met het bedenken van andere oplossingen. Het kan zijn dat je iemand kent die wél wil en kan helpen. Op die manier kun je positief nee zeggen tegen vrienden en op het werk … zonder schuldgevoel!
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